Why I Veil

A scarf I sometimes use as a veil.

A few years ago, maybe 4, I felt a longing in my heart to veil during Mass.

I didn't know anything about the practice,

nor did I know anyone who veiled.

I didn't understand why I was feeling this at the time,

but I did know God was calling me to take up this practice.

It was the exact same way He called me to receive the Holy Eucharist on the tongue.

It was something I felt in my heart was the right thing to do,

even though (at the time) I didn't know the concrete reasons.

In both instances, I was afraid, a coward.

No one in my Parish veiled and I really didn't want to stand out or be thought of as a holy rolling weirdo (though I'm pretty sure I already was.)

Still, my pride held me back.

Year after year,

I felt the longing in my soul every time I was in a Sacred place to be veiled.

It just wouldn't quit.

When I worked at my local Catholic Store (before Dominic was born)

someone came in and asked if we carried chapel veils.

We didn't, but I knew we should.

First I decided to do some research on the practice and read stuff like this,

which spoke to my tradition loving self

but didn't really convince me that I "needed to" veil.

I looked online at some pretty veils to order for the store and decided,

why don't I ask my Grandma?

After work I went to her house and asked if she used to veil,

and is so, if she still had her veil.

I knew she would, us Meisinger women don't throw good things out.

She gave it to me let me borrow it to help pick veils for the store

and it did help.

I never gave it back.

Sorry Grandma!

Every Sunday before going to Mass, I would look at this beautiful vintage white lace Spanish veil and dream of taking it with me and wearing it.

My lame excuse was I just didn't want to be a distraction.

But God kept calling me. Asking me. Pleading with me.

I needed to veil.

Two years ago I took a job at a Parish a couple towns over as a Director of Youth Ministry.

At this beautiful Parish, which I know call home,

I attended my first Extraordinary Form of the Mass.

I wore my (Grandma's) veil for the first time.

There I didn't stand out as there were plenty of veiled women.

It felt right.

I felt, beautiful.

I felt like a woman.

A woman acknowledging God's creation.

When I next attended the Ordinary Form,
I knew it would be hypocritical not to veil,

so I did.

And have ever since.

I love it.

It does not make me more modest, or reverent than women who don't veil,

but it does make ME more modest and reverent than when I didn't.

At Mass, the Earthly veil is lifted and we are literally IN HEAVEN.

All the Saint and all the Angels are present,

and Jesus our Lord and Saviour is physically present.

Call me weak, but I need to veil myself to remember this.

I think some women look at veiling as demeaning.

I think nothing could be farther from the truth.
What is a veil if not something that honors the beauty underneath?

We veil what is Holy.

Traditionally the tabernacle is veiled because in it is the Holy of Holies.

Women, is holy because she carries life, 
a new soul, in her womb.
Which is why contraception is such a sin,

it is denying who God created us to be.

The Theology of the veil reveals much to us.

It reveals to me that

God made me.

He made me for Him.

He made me for my husband.

All of God's good creation echos and honors Him.

When I veil, it reminds me that my body is in fact,

a veil.

A veil honoring true beauty I am,

that of my soul.